Flat Earth Tony

by Longtooth & Wasterman

  • Streaming + Download

    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.
    Purchasable with gift card

      name your price



Created in a couple of hours when Wasterman dropped by with a bass guitar, a bag of lyrics which combined with Longtooth's lyrics, laptop and mutual appreciation of the cha cha cha!

Video available youtu.be/Z7Jk6YnN2Vo


Flat Earth Tony

Woke up feeling toxic
Broke my coffee cup
Yeah dropped it
So standing here
End of days is so moronic
Got car parked in two spaces
Pulled jacks instead of aces
The hat man on my cases
With stupid stupid faces

I’m hating on the things that people do
I don’t believe we made it to the moon

The earth she is not round yeah
Just look how flat the ground is
Trolls sitting on the ledge there
Go sailing off the edge yeah

Well Jesus Icke
You gave me a fright
You used to be a geezer
Yeah you used to be alright
You watched too many episodes
Of land of the giants
And journey to the centre of the earth

Too many episodes
Of land of the giants
And journey to the centre of the earth

You’re lizard food now mofo
When the chips are down you know so
They’re vacuum packed in bunkers
We’ll slice you into dunkers

You cant get cured of zombies
Now you’re flesh eating hombres
Don’t grow up its a trap bud
We’re gonna cull you with a 5g Zap!

Sing something stupid
Please don’t challenge my mind
Don’t wake me up
Because I’m happily blind

Lyrics © 2019 Longtooth & Wasterman (Semple & Traae)


released July 18, 2019


all rights reserved



Longtooth & Wasterman Leicester, UK

Leicester's Longtooth and Wasterman, aka Greg and Karl, step up to become punk  USB Warriors, with  influences driven by dnb, hiphop thumping beats and a love for punk. Described by Sounds recently ‘to have hardcore beats fuelled by an incendiary swagger that lands somewhere between Crass, Atari Teenage Riot and an angrier Sleaford Mods!' — excerpt from 'Sounds' Review on facebook 24/3/19 ... more

contact / help

Contact Longtooth & Wasterman

Streaming and
Download help

Redeem code

If you like Longtooth & Wasterman, you may also like: